My First Choice
by xonceinadream
Summary: [seblaine week] Sebastian can't be Blaine's affair anymore. He ends it. He's prepared to stay strong when Blaine knocks on his door two months later. Then Blaine hands him a key.


**Written for Seblaine Week on Tumblr.**

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Fairy tale, unrequited, orgasm, sweet, holding hands

If this was a fairy tale, Blaine would love him more.

If this was a fairy tale, Blaine wouldn't be married with two kids to a man who he rarely sees but won't divorce since he's been with him since high school.

If this was a fairy tale, Sebastian would look him in the eyes, press his lips to Blaine's, hold him close as he fucks him.

If this was a fairy tale, Sebastian would see a happily ever in sight.

This isn't a fairy tale.

Sebastian's body is draped over Blaine's back, the only intimacy is their tangled fingers as Blaine whines underneath him. "Harder!" Blaine moans, his eyes closed, his cheek pressed against the silky pillowcase.

It's easy to oblige him. Sebastian thrusts into him in what had been a rhythm a few minutes ago and now is just desperate movements. It's been too long. Kurt had been between movies for two months which meant that Blaine had spent every moment he could at his side. But Blaine had called Sebastian, complaining about Kurt, kids, life, and missing him and Sebastian can deny him nothing.

Sebastian closes his eyes, his teeth gritting at the very thought. He doesn't want to think about Kurt while he's so deep in Blaine.

He feels Blaine clench around him, his own orgasm following quickly and he slumps on top of the smaller man, his eyes falling closed. It's so easy to get lost, to pretend in fleeting seconds that Blaine is his. It's not fair, really. Blaine reaches up, stroking his fingers through Sebastian's short hair as he makes a humming noise in pleasure.

"I need to go," Blaine whispers and Sebastian groans, rolling off him. He can see the regret in Blaine's eyes. The other man knows he shouldn't be here, in Sebastian's bed, getting off with him while his husband watches their children at home.

"You can't just let me enjoy the afterglow for five minutes, can you?" Sebastian grumbles, not looking at Blaine even as the other man tangles their fingers again, kissing Sebastian's knuckles. It's so hard to stay mad at Blaine when Blaine is the sweetest man he's ever met.

Ever since they met, Sebastian's been in love with Blaine. There was something about him that screamed love at first sight even though Sebastian was a teenager who loved nobody. The more he got to know Blaine, the real Blaine underneath everything, the more he loved him. And he finds it highly unfair that he has to let Blaine go back to the man he knows doesn't love him that way.

Blaine smiles, leaning in to nuzzle Sebastian's neck. "Enjoy the afterglow by yourself. Maybe jack off again thinking about it. But Kurt gets antsy when he's alone with the kids."

"Surprise, surprise," Sebastian says, cupping Blaine's cheek so he can pull Blaine's lips to his, the kiss not enough. It's never enough. Nothing is ever enough when he has to let Blaine go as soon as he's done with him. It'll be better once Kurt's gone again. When the kids go back to their preschool and Sebastian can hold Blaine for hours at a time. It's easier to pretend that Blaine wants him as much as Sebastian wants Blaine then.

"You know I hate when you talk about Kurt that way," Blaine responds when he pulls back from the kiss.

Groaning, Sebastian lets himself fall back onto the bed. He doesn't even look up when the other man stands and stretches, looking for his clothes so he can get dressed. It's normally a sight Sebastian cherishes. The last he gets to see of Blaine before Blaine goes back to his family. "You're angry because I'm talking shit about your husband, not because your husband can't take care of your kids for a few hours?"

The tightening of Blaine's lips should be a warning to Sebastian but it isn't. It's not enough of a warning, anyway. Sebastian's just getting so tired of it all. He's tired of Blaine acting like what they have doesn't matter. He's tired of not being enough.

"Sebastian, I don't want to fight."

"You never want to fight. That's your problem," Sebastian says, watching as Blaine's back tenses. He should leave well enough alone but Sebastian's never been good at that. He's the type who pushes and pushes. It's a sharp contrast to Blaine's passiveness. "If you would fight for what _you_ want for once in your damn life maybe you wouldn't need to be cheating on your husband constantly!"

Blaine rounds on Sebastian, angrier than Sebastian's ever seen him and Sebastian sits up straighter. Underneath the fury there are tears in Blaine's eyes and even through his own irritation, Sebastian feels guilty. "And what if what I want isn't you?"

"Then get out and stay out. Because I'm not going to be your second choice anymore, Blaine Anderson."

There's a flash of pain on Blaine's face and then he nods, drawing in his breath with a sharp sound. "Fine. Fine," Blaine snaps, pulling his jacket on. He doesn't even look back as he stalks out of the room, out of the apartment, out of Sebastian's life.

Sebastian slumps back on the bed, telling himself this is for the best. He's never going to be happy if Blaine's constantly going back to his husband. The short time they had together wasn't enough. But Sebastian was already looking forward to them having more time together. What's he going to do now?

 _Two Months, Three Days, Twenty Hours, Sixteen Minutes, Thirty-Two Seconds Later (But who is really counting?)_

The knock on the door makes Sebastian jump, and he grumbles as he gets up. He has no idea which one of his friends is here but he's not really in the mood. He hasn't been in the mood for two months now and, as much as he doesn't want to admit it, he knows why.

That's why, when he sees Blaine's smiling face when he opens the door, he shuts it again immediately.

"Really?" Blaine asks from the other side of the door, sounding more amused than hurt.

Perhaps Sebastian was hasty. He opens the door again, his jaw setting. He suddenly knows why Blaine is here and he feels his heart harden. Blaine's always in a good mood when Kurt goes back out to the movie sets and Sebastian wonders when Blaine's going to realize that.

Blaine's smile makes his heart pound as he steps in around Sebastian, taking off his coat and setting it over the table that Sebastian normally sets his mail on.

"What are you doing here?"

"I wasn't sure you'd be alone," Blaine says, ignoring the question as he turns to look at Sebastian. He looks nervous, bouncing on the balls of his heels.

One part of Sebastian wants to pull Blaine closer. He knows what Blaine is here for. They've hooked up enough for Sebastian to recognize the signs. But the other part of Sebastian knows he needs to protect his heart. Blaine's stepped on it enough. "Haven't had time to go to the bar yet today," Sebastian responds easily, going towards the couch to sit down. If Blaine's going to make himself at home anyway then so will Sebastian.

Blaine follows him but he doesn't join him on the couch. Instead, he sits in one of the chairs facing the couch, leaning forward. The words don't seem to affect him the way Sebastian had wanted them to. "I'm sorry I haven't called in the past two months. I needed-"

"No, don't tell me," Sebastian interrupts, putting as much venom as he can into his voice, leaning forward to match Blaine's posture. "Kurt's out of town now. The kids are back in preschool. You're here to get fucked."

"Actually, no. I mean, if that happens I'm not going to say no but…" Blaine smirks cheekily and Sebastian has to fight to keep his own lips from matching his. He hates how easily Blaine can turn his mood around. He has to fight to keep himself from giving in. When he doesn't get a response, Blaine reaches into his pocket, taking out a key and holding it towards Sebastian in the palm of his hand. "I came to give you a house key."

"To your and Kurt's apartment? You already gave me one, remember?" Sebastian asks, wondering whether Blaine thinks this entire issue is going to be solved by inviting Sebastian further into his life.

Blaine shakes his head, shaking his hand and Sebastian sighs before picking up the key. "No. It's a house, actually. It's nice. It's huge and an amazing price. Just renting right now but the owner's expressed interest in selling if we like it. It's got enough rooms for an office with two desks plus a playroom for the kids. A big yard for a dog, maybe. It's a gated community which makes me feel better with the kids."

Sebastian wants to stop him. He can feel his heart shattering a little bit more with every selling point Blaine gives him on the house. But Sebastian's always dealt with the pain when it came to Blaine.

"There's a cute coffee shop only a few miles away for when you want to get me coffee in the morning. The kids will have to change schools but I looked into the district and it's amazing. It's… quite a bit farther away from your office but I know you've been wanting an excuse to work from home more, anyway."

"From my office? Blaine, we don't do overnights," Sebastian responds bitterly. He lets out a frustrated breath, running his fingers through his hair. Is this Blaine's peace offering? The idea that Sebastian can come into the home Blaine shares with Kurt and act like a replacement while Kurt is gone? "You should go."

Blaine doesn't move. "Sebastian, I'm asking you to move in with me."

Sebastian hesitates because that wasn't what he was expecting. His brain kicks into overdrive as he frowns. "And what would Kurt think about that?"

Blaine's eyes don't waver from his as he leans forward, taking both of Sebastian's hands, the key in between their palms. "Well, once the divorce I filed is finalized, he won't have any say."

"You filed for divorce?" Sebastian asks, not sure he understands the words even as he says them. Blaine and Kurt have been together forever. Sebastian never would've imagined this.

A small smile appears on Blaine's lips as he shrugs. "You were right. I wasn't treating you or Kurt fairly. I thought that I was fighting for what I wanted but I realized I was fighting for something I thought I already had. And I… I realized that I was fighting for Kurt's love and time and attention which was silly because I didn't want it anymore. The worst part, Sebastian? He wasn't even surprised. It's like he knew it was coming but didn't care. That's why I didn't call you. I wanted to. I wanted you to hold me and comfort me but… I wanted to make sure you weren't just a replacement for Kurt."

"And now?" Sebastian breathes, his hands tightening around Blaine's.

And Blaine's smile brightens. "Now, after a month living by myself with just the kids, I know you're not my second choice. You're not a replacement. You're my first choice. You're the man I want to have coffee with in the morning and curl up with every night. I want to kiss you whenever and wherever I want to. I want to hold your hand and watch scary movies together. Someday I want to marry you and I want you to be a father to my kids. And I know that's… a lot but I've never done things halfway."

Sebastian laughs because that's true. He can't actually believe this is happening right now and his mind is having a hard time processing it. "You really don't want to be with Kurt anymore?"

"No, Sebastian. Just you. I know I've hurt you… So much. I… stopped talking to you a dozen times because Kurt said I should. I should've fought for you, you were right. I should've fought for what I wanted but I'm willing to fight now. You've always loved me more than I deserved. Please tell me I didn't ruin it."

Another laugh and then Sebastian's pulling his empty hand away to cup Blaine's cheek, leaning forward to kiss him in reassurance. Tears fill his eyes because this is more than he'd thought would happen. Blaine _loves_ him. Blaine wants to be with him and Sebastian's wanted this for years.

"Nobody could ever love you as much as you deserve," Sebastian whispers against Blaine's lips. "But I'm damn well going to spend the rest of my life trying. Of course. Of course I want all of that with you."

The key is cool in his hand as he kisses Blaine again. It feels like a promise.


End file.
